The Easy Way to Manage Your Feminine Emotional Territory While Dating

Today is just one of those days. I am blessed beyond measure, I am living my dreams and life is full of possibilities.

But I recommend that you keep at least a 10 foot distance from me. My grumpiness is taking no prisoners. Yes, I am angry, frustrated, possibly could strangle someone, and my humor took a hike last night.

Guess what, I am a woman and this is part of my emotional territory.

Over the past several years there has been a big push into the world of positive thinking. I was working my juicy butt off to be at the top of this list but time and time again I failed miserably.
Till finally I said,’Fuck It’.

Then all of a sudden, the cloudiness cleared and genuine delight, laughter, and spontaneity emerged from me. I started to experience the really cool, euphoric and numinous. Finally I didn’t feel burdened to have to keep my thoughts ‘inline’ all the time.

Let’s be upfront about something.Being a Negative Nancy will not help you much in life or more specifically in dating and romance. Still it is important to recognize that as a woman, you are gifted with a full range of emotions. If you decide to constantly refuse feeling your emotions then at some point they will come back to insist you feel them, exponentially.

On the flip side (of course you knew we weren’t getting off that easily), not only is it important to feel your emotions but it is equally important to not punish the rest of the world with them, especially men.

Just as we have emotions in order to feel them, do note that they are solely your responsibility. The biggest blunder I see women do with this is going to one extreme or the other. For example in the name of complete transparency, a woman will go on a date and tell the new guy every rotten thing that has happened to her in her lifetime. (BTW, just in case this isn’t obvious, most men DO NOT find this attractive on any level) The other extreme is a woman so afraid of sharing her emotional darkness that she bottles it up and smiles till it literally makes her ill. Finding balance will be freeing to you and your dating adventures.

Do men really care about how we feel?

Absolutely, men adore us. They truly want to know about what makes us tick. They love to support us emotionally as much as possible. They love, love, love, when they can bring a smile to our faces. Here’s the catch… It’s much easier to do this when they don’t feel personally responsible for all the woes of your life. He can only feel responsible for so much of your anguish. If you are constantly blaming your feelings on him, at some point he will emotionally or literally bail.

This means whether you are in the beginning of dating, or the midst of a relationship it is your job to inspire and create space for men to understand your emotional range and territory.

How do you do this?

First off, by being responsible for your emotions. Hey we ALL have them. If you are having a particularly rough day give the men and women around you an emotional disclaimer. If you have the opportunity, check out for a little while to have a ‘Feel your Emotions’ fest. There are lots of different tools to use to acknowledge where you are at.

Next, give up the guilt surrounding being a woman with emotions. Own them. They are yours, make not one apology for them. Just remember to refrain from punishing others because of them.

Finally, as you practice your emotional integrity, your world will open up more and more venues for love and fun but you may need to practice not taking on responsibility for other peoples emotional territory as well. Always remember, just as your emotions are no one else’s responsibility, theirs do not belong to you either.

So, if you are dating someone who blames you for their stuff, just kindly let them know that you are already at capacity with your own feelings 😎

Let us know how you are handling up on your emotional territory by commenting below, and then share this with your friends on Twitter or Facebook. Muah!

XO,
Jenn

P.S.

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